Book Review: When I Was Death by Alexis Henderson

There are some books that hook you from the description alone, and When I Was Death by Alexis Henderson absolutely did that for me.

A girl gang of teenage girls in vintage clothes, traveling cross-country in a truck and RV, carrying out Death’s bidding? It has this intoxicating, cinematic vibe — a dark twist on something that almost feels like every teen girl’s dream. The makeup, the closeness, the freedom, the belonging — that sense of being part of something bigger than yourself. It’s easy to understand how anyone could be pulled in.

And that’s what makes it so powerful.

Yes, there is darkness here. These girls are doing Death’s work. But the story doesn’t throw you into the deep end all at once. You ease into it, just like they do. That gradual unraveling makes it even more unsettling. It’s not horror for shock value — it’s layered, emotional, and deeply rooted in grief.

Roslyn’s grief over Adeline is suffocating in the most palpable way. You can feel how lost she is — how she’s not just mourning someone she loved, but mourning parts of herself that disappeared along with Adeline. I was instantly drawn to Roslyn, almost in a maternal way. I wanted to protect her. The unknown surrounding Adeline’s death adds a constant undercurrent of tension. Adeline feels cryptic, almost unknowable, and the mystery of what truly happened to her lingers throughout the story.

Death himself has his properly creepy moments, and there’s an eerie presence woven through everything. The book is fairly short, but it flows beautifully and carries surprising emotional weight. It’s layered and, at times, messy — in the way grief is messy. In the way teenage identity is messy. There were multiple moments where I found myself thinking, Could this get worse? Could this go even further?

As a parent, I’ll admit I felt uneasy at how glamorized parts of it seemed. The charisma of this group is undeniable. The aesthetic. The confidence. The sense of power. You can absolutely see how someone vulnerable could be swept away by it. But what I appreciated most is that by the end, the illusion begins to crack. The girls are exhausted. They miss their families. They’re tired. The shine wears off, and the cost becomes visible. Watching that unraveling felt important.

Roslyn’s cleverness and resilience really shine in those final moments, and it left me thinking long after I closed the book.

Overall, When I Was Death is atmospheric, emotional, and haunting — a quick read that carries a lot of weight in its pages.

You can see my review for Goodreads here:

Goodreads Review

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Young Readers Group | G.P. Putnam’s Sons Books for Young Readers for the ARC. All thoughts are entirely my own.